Now that I am a wise married man, it only makes sense to break down the 2023 starters using relationship status options.
MARRIED
These teams are married to their quarterback the way Patrick Mahomes is married to the AFC Championship game, and the one thing they have in common is you can expect these organizations to have the same face at the helm for the next several years.
Buffalo Bills: Josh Allen’s play has been hot and cold all season for a team that was one of the early season favorites to win the Super Bowl. Poorly timed interceptions and uncharacteristic play from Allen will prevent him from winning the MVP this season. Unfortunately, Allen’s contract kicks in next season, so the jury is out on if the front office can surround him with enough talent to reach a Super Bowl finally. 2023 Starter: Josh Allen
Photo courtesy Yahoo! Sports
Cincinnati Bengals: Joey cool started slow this season, but as the weather gets colder and the games get closer, he gets better. Dan Orlovski said it best when he called Burrow “this generation’s Tom Brady.” He won’t make the flashy throws like Justin Herbert or Patrick Mahomes, similar to Aaron Rodgers over the last two decades, but he will win you games through the air and by picking defenses apart, just like Tom Brady. The Bengals are set for a while. 2023 Starter: Joe Burrow
Kansas City Chiefs: The #1 ranked offense in the NFL after losing a superstar like Tyreek Hill. An impressive season by Mahomes has now led him back to the Super Bowl with hopes of adding a second ring to his already impressive career. The Chiefs have their QB and coach and will be a threat to the AFC as long as both are around. 2023 Starter: Patrick Mahomes.
Los Angeles Chargers: There are only two sure things this season for the Chargers. One is they will get a highlight play out of Justin Herbert, and the other is they don’t win games against a better team. Their only good win this season thus far is against the Dolphins, who you could argue are inconsistent in their own right. Herbert, however, has played relatively well this season with many injuries around him. 2023 should be a bounce-back year for the Chargers. 2023 Starter: Justin Herbert
Philadelphia Eagles: Unlike most garbage Philly fans, I don’t let biases into my decision-making. So although I think Jalen Hurts will fall closer to the career track of Lamar Jackson than Patrick Mahomes, the Eagles have their QB for the future. He was a little banged up at the end of the year, but he has helped lead Philadelphia back to the title game, where he will face off against the other front-runner for this season’s MVP. 2023 Starter: Jalen Hurts
IN A RELATIONSHIP
The difference in this group of teams compared to the married group or the below groups is that neither of them will end the relationship soon.
Photo courtesy Wall Street Journal
Dallas Cowboys: There are few jobs better for your brand than quarterbacking the Dallas Cowboys. Sure, they’ve had their seasons ruined from injury or facepalm play from backup-worthy guys, but when you look at Danny White, Roger Staubach, Troy Aikman, Tony Romo, and now Dak Prescott, it shows that wearing the star can give your career great life. It’s doubtful the Cowboys will move on from Dak anytime soon, but if his decision-making doesn’t turn around, he will not finish his career in Dallas. 2023 Starter: Dak Prescott
Los Angeles Rams: Selling the farm proved its worth, with the Rams winning the Super Bowl last season. That being said, injury after injury and no future assets have led to questions about what the Rams will be in the coming years. With no near-future assets and a contract through the 2026 season, Matthew Stafford and the Rams will continue living in salary cap hell when the season kicks off. 2023 Starter: Matthew Stafford, 2023 Backup: Baker Mayfield
Minnesota Vikings: Kirk Cousins and the Vikings have put together an impressive campaign in the NFC this season, winning close game after close game. On the one hand, Percocet Cousins has led multiple game-winning drives, but on the other, he has a 12-41 record against teams that finish with a winning record. Minnesota could be a few pieces away from making an actual Super Bowl run next season. 2023 Starter: Kirk Cousins
ENGAGED
Being engaged is exciting in real life and for your franchise, but there is one caveat: sometimes engagements can fall through.
Chicago Bears: Justin Fields has had a somewhat rocky start to his career. Offensive play calling purgatory and limited to no weapons on the outside has not allowed him to show much promise in the passing game; however, his running ability has shown flashes to give any defensive coordinator a headache. With the Bears now falling into the first pick, opinions will be off the charts about what to do with it, but I believe they will move back and attempt to fill more holes on the roster. 2023 Starter: Justin Fields
Photo courtesy USA TODAY Sports & The Atlantic
Jacksonville Jaguars: The most impressive sophomore campaign has been from Trevor Lawrence. The Jaguars’ turnaround by Doug Pederson and Trevor Lawrence has taken over the AFC South (albeit the hot garbage of a division that it is), and it could be a new normal if the rest of the division doesn’t figure something out. 2023 Starter: Trevor Lawrence
Pittsburgh Steelers: The Steelers started the year with Mid Trubisky behind center and made a move to Pickett, who has now put together a solid rookie campaign. With questions around Lamar Jackson’s future and the unknown of a full Browns season with DeShaun Watson, the Steelers are in a good position to run it back with Kenny Pickett. 2023 Starter: Kenny Pickett
DOMESTIC PARTNERSHIP
It’s not the most stable of agreements.
Photo courtesy Ohio Sports Radio
Cleveland Browns: I triggered Browns fans on Reddit by first saying Baker Mayfield would not get his option picked up in my 2021 QB carousel. Last season I opted for the Browns to target Kirk Cousins or another vet to take the helm. Not to stroke my ego or anything (pun intended), but I was right both years, and I expect to get Clevelands QB right again in 2023. DeShaun Watson came in after an 11-game suspension and looked about as good as any QB who hasn’t played football in two years could look. He will be the starter next season, but time will tell if that controversial trade was worth it for Cleveland. 2023 Starter: DeShaun Watson
Denver Broncos: There are 107 million reasons why Russell Wilson is not leaving Denver anytime soon. Wilson spent most of the year with more nicknames and bathrooms than touchdown passes. The only thing “DangerRuss” this season was Wilson getting too close to his teammates on the sideline. Maybe a new coach can help him get back to being a competent quarterback, but regardless of who the new skipper is, the Denver Broncos are partnered with Mr. Unlimited for the foreseeable future. 2023 Starter: Russell Wilson
IT’S COMPLICATED
The following teams have a QB in place but with potentially more questions than answers.
Arizona Cardinals: In the 2018 draft, Josh Rosen was selected 10th overall in a class that included Baker Mayfield, Sam Darnold, Josh Allen, Lamar Jackson, and Mike White, and an argument can be made that the only two with sustained success in the NFL are Allen and Jackson. Fast forward just one year later, and they kicked Rosen to the curb in favor of Kyler Murray, which seemed to be leading in the right direction until it came out he plays more Call of Duty than watches film. Either way, Murray will not be ready to start the season so the Cardinals will roll with a risky vet for one of two reasons. One is it could keep them competitive until Murray returns, or two because if they fall further behind, it will put them in the running for Caleb Williams in the 2024 draft. 2023 Starter: Carson Wentz, 2023 Injured List: Kyler Murray
Photo courtesy Baltimore Sun
Baltimore Ravens: The Ravens and Lamar Jackson have not been able to get an extension done, but with the franchise tag in play, all signs point to him sporting the black and purple in 2023. That being said, if Jackson feels slighted by the front office, he could ask for a trade which we all know is usually a death sentence with your current team in today’s NFL. We will see if the franchise tag allows them to restructure a long-term deal or if it will push Lamar out the door. 2023 Starter: Lamar Jackson
New York Giants: The New York Football Giants decided not to pick up the 5th-year option for Daniel Jones, and rightfully so. Call me cynical, but I don’t believe Daniel Jones is the answer in New York; however, he has played well enough this year to warrant another short-term contract in the big apple. Derek Carr could be an option here, but Brian Daboll has unlocked the best of Jones thus far, so the safer bet is to lock in what is familiar before they explore options that may or may not be an upgrade. 2023 Starter: Daniel Jones
San Francisco 49ers: The San Francisco 49ers have been the bully of the NFC for the last decade while playing in at least the Conference Championship in five of those seasons. Now on their third QB this season, they seem never to miss a beat and sneak by wins with an elite defense and perfectly timed Shanahan offense. Brock Purdy has stepped in and kept the momentum going on the offense and has vastly out-performed Jimmy G; however, Purdy was the last pick in the draft for a reason, so although I think Trey Lance would have won the quarterback battle this fall, it will no longer matter with Purdy undergoing Tommy John surgery. 2023 Starter: Trey Lance. 2023 Backup: Brock Purdy
Seattle Seahawks: Not many expected the Seahawks to be relevant this season, let alone in the playoffs, and Geno Smith is a big reason for that. He took full advantage in a year when the Rams and Cardinals took a step back. With five picks in the top 85, I think Seattle spends one of them on a QB, whether Anthony Richardson at pick 20 if he falls or taking a flier on Hendon Hooker with one of the two second-round picks. 2023 Starter: Geno Smith, 2023 Backup: Anthony Richardson
OPEN RELATIONSHIP
This group of teams all have a more than comparable QB in place, but no one would be surprised if they added a new face before the 2023 schedule kicks off.
Detroit Lions: One of the season’s biggest surprises was the offense the Lions were able to put together, ranking top five in the NFL. They fell just short of the playoffs but have some lovely pieces in place to build upon going into next season. Goff still rides the up-and-down wave in his play, but he will still be the signal caller under center when Detroit has their first game in September. Don’t get me wrong, they could use the 6th pick to add an excellent piece on defense, but with having two picks in the top 20, I could see them drafting Will Levis if he is available at six, but I don’t think he will be available. 2023 Starter: Jared Goff
Photo courtesy Change.org
Miami Dolphins: Katy Perry’s song Hot & Cold best describes the Miami Dolphins this season. Grinding out wins against playoff-caliber teams one week and borderline Weekend at Bernie’s the next…Literally. Tua has shown he can get the job done but will head injuries and inconsistent play put his future in question? The Dolphins could be entering a Super Bowl contending window, but with the lingering concussion issues of Tua, they will also invest in a solid NFL backup this offseason. 2023 Starter: Tua Tagovailoa, 2023 Backup: Sam Darnold
New England Patriots: I think Bill Belichick would love to move off of Mac Jones and roll with the likes of Derek Carr or Jimmy G. He could even have an appetite to run with his former partner in crime Tom Brady for what most likely be one or two of their final seasons. With so many staff changes, I doubt they will add QB to the list of new faces next season and will roll with the mediocre Mac Jones. 2023 Starter: Mac Jones
New York Jets: If the New York Jets are a decent quarterback away from the playoffs and a good quarterback away from AFC contention. Zach Wilson had a very tough year, and many think he is done in New York; however, I don’t think the book is closed. The Jets have hired Nathaniel Hackett as their OC, who helped Aaron Rodgers win back-to-back MVPs. I see them trading for Rodgers and WINNING the AFC East next season. 2023 Starter: Aaron Rodgers. 2023 Backup: Zach Wilson
Tennessee Titans: It’s very plausible that Ryan Tannehill will be back with the Titans next season. With Mike Vrabel taking on more decision-making with personnel, I wouldn’t be surprised if they released him this spring. Tennessee threw out three different quarterbacks this year, all of who were mediocre. With the AFC being a powerhouse of top teams, they look to start a mini rebuild. You will not beat the conference’s top teams with an aging Tannehill, so expect this season to be his last in Nashville. 2023 Starter: Ryan Tannehill
SEPARATED/DIVORCED
When teams separate from their franchise QB, things can get messy, and when things get messy, fans start to take sides.
Photo courtesy Packers Wire-USAToday
Green Bay Packers: Packers fans are in disarray not knowing if their Hall of Fame QB will be returning next season, and the organization is mulling whether they move on to their first-round draft pick, who has been sitting for a couple of years. Sound familiar? I believe this offseason, Aaron Rodgers will be traded post-June 1 to make the money work, and the Packers will hand the keys over to Jordan Love. Time will tell if Green Bay has found lightning in a bottle for the third time. 2023 Starter: Jordan Love
Indianapolis Colts: The Texans winning in Week 18 threw a wrinkle into the top 10 of the draft. It went from Houston having their pick of the top guys at 1 to anyone in the top 10-12 trading up to jump them and select their guy. Insert the Colts, who hold the 4th pick in the draft with a GM who has continued to bring in a different veteran for five straight years. I expect the Colts to trade into the number one draft spot and select their guy. Bryce Young may be the most polished QB in the draft, but I believe Chris Ballard and Jim Irsay value size and will go all in for CJ Stroud. 2023 Starter: CJ Stroud
Las Vegas Raiders: “You’re sticking with that f*****g guy?” Tom Brady said a few years ago. Now the Raiders are forced to retain Josh McDaniels; worse yet, they compete in one of the best divisions in football. The only thing that could save McDaniel’s job in Sin City is reuniting with a familiar face from his time in New England, and it’s not Tom Brady: it’s Jimmy G. 2023 Starter: Jimmy Garoppolo. 2023 Backup: Jarrett Stidham
Tampa Bay Buccaneers: Todd Bowles is entering year two. He will have his first full year with a staff he picks, the Bucs have a solid roster, and they play in a garbage conference. What does that mean? Expect Tampa Bay to make a move for a veteran via trade and set themselves up to win the NFC South. Jimmy G is an intriguing option because of his resume of getting to championship weekend and beyond. Still, I believe they will call up rookie GM Dave Ziegler and make a push for Derek Carr. 2023 Starter: Derek Carr
Washington Commanders: The Washington Commanders have a lot of talent on both sides of football. Their defense showed flashes through the second half of the season, there are weapons on the outside, beginning with Scary Terry, and Brian Robinson looked like a good running back for the foreseeable future. The blemishes for the Commanders start with garbage play calling that led to their OC being fired, atrocious offensive line play, and bad quarterback play. Heinicke fans can save their breath; he beat one team over his nine starts that finished with a winning record. The Commanders will not get the likes of Derek Carr, and they don’t have the luxury of using current draft capital to move up for one of the top QBs, so expect them to turn to Sam Howell in his second year. 2023 Starter: Sam Howell
WIDOWED
A pretty straightforward name for a group of teams looking to turn the page and find their new franchise quarterback.
Atlanta Falcons: Desmond Ridder came in toward the end of the year and did some nice things. That being said, I haven’t seen that many balls hit the back of someone’s helmet since watching the movie Bad News Bears. The guy simply cannot throw over the line of scrimmage. Maybe he needs some more time to figure it out, but this problem goes back to his days at Cincinnati. Atlanta could dip back into the QB well with their 7th pick, but I predict they will see what improvements Ridder can make before taking a flier on another rookie. 2023 Starter: Desmond Ridder
Logo courtesy Sports Illustrated
Carolina Panthers: Where QBs go to die…. Carolina is the football version of the movie Groundhog Day in which they are terrible every year but then win a few games and do not secure a top-five pick. Frank Reich returns to a team he used to lead under center but this time as the head skipper. We know Reich was a big reason the Eagles traded up to the 2nd pick when they selected Carson Wentz in 2016, and I believe he is a part of another blockbuster on Draft Day. With six picks in the first four rounds, the Panthers will trade up with Seattle at pick five and select Will Levis from Kentucky. 2023 Starter: Will Levis. 2023 Backup: PJ Walker
Houston Texans: Lovie Smith giving the franchise the middle finger on his way out in week 18 is one of my favorite moments of the year. He did not get a fair shake at the head coaching position in Houston and made the front office pay for it by moving back to the second pick in this year’s draft. Even after leaving the Texans with that mess, my gut tells me they still end up with their number one option and draft Bryce Young. 2023 Starter: Bryce Young, 2023 Backup: Davis Mills
New Orleans Saints: The Saints have been the definition of widowed since Drew Brees retired. Now they have had their quarterback carousel going on, and as entertaining as it has been, all things must end eventually. That being said, I don’t think it will end this year. They will draft a quarterback at pick 29 or 40, potentially Hendon Hooker, and it will be a coinflip if they start the season with the rookie under center. 2023 Starter: Jameis Winston, 2022 Backup: Hendon Hooker
