Carlin liked to turn the world upside down. He did that with sports.
George Carlin was unique. There’s no other way to say it. His ‘Seven Words You Can Never Say on TV” will go down in history as one of the best satiric stand-up routines ever.
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Carlin was smart, sharp-tongued, and very particular about his sports. “To my way of thinking, there really are only three sports: baseball, football, and basketball,” Carlin once said. “Everything else is either a game or activity.”
He didn’t stop there. In true Carlin fashion, he ticked off why other sports just aren’t…well…sports.
Hockey “isn’t a sport because it has three activities that take place at the same time–skating, fooling around with a puck, and beating the —- out of somebody.”
Soccer “isn’t a sport because you can’t use your arms.”
Track and cross-country aren’t sports “because anyone can do it.”
Swimming isn’t a sport “because it’s a way to keep from drowning.”
Boxing isn’t a sport “because you have to rent shoes.”
Billards isn’t a sport “because there’s no chance of serious injury.”
He goes on and on…. Darts “could have been a sport,” lacrosse, field hockey, and fencing are “——y college —-,” tennis “is fruity,” and hunting is only good for “many fatal accidents on weekends.”
Yes, George Carlin was one of a kind. Sometimes he was tongue-in-cheek and, at other times, he was just cheeky.
He had much more to say about sports, too. (R-rated)
