Storyline: Most athletes don’t make negative headline news, but some transgress and fall from grace. An early warning sign is a pattern of disruptive behavior. In this piece we look at two recent cases–Draymond Green and Chris Sale–and discuss why each athlete needs to do a better job of managing emotions.
What if gobs of people followed, inspected, dissected, and discussed everything you did for a living? What if your private life became fodder for public commentary?
Most of us don’t need to be worried. But it’s a different story if you’re an athlete. Worry you must. Your on- and off-field actions will be followed, reported, critiqued, and judged.
The good news is that most athletes handle themselves admirably. Derek Jeter comes to mind. Known as “The Captain,” Jeter always seemed to do the right thing in the right way. For years Jeter performed under the glare of very bright lights–New York City.
A current example is Kirk Cousins, starting NFL QB. Initially thought to be a throw-in draft choice (picked the same year as the player who was going to be Washington’s QB of the future), Cousins handled himself well–working hard, learning the system. Today, he’s not only the starter–and a record-breaking player, I might add–he’s also getting exceptional marks for off-the-field behavior.
Courtesy: whspawprint.com
But other players transgress and some pay a steep price. They “Fall from Grace.” That happens when significant troubles outweigh athletic triumphs–majestic careers often sacrificed in the exchange. Consider what happened to Lance Armstrong, O.J. Simpson, and Pete Rose.
And while individual circumstances vary, the collective outcome is always the same: what’s done is done and there’s no going back. The Mets’ Jerry Mejia knows that. He was recently banned for life from MLB for repeated use of performance-enhancing drugs.
But what about players who’ve transgressed, but for whom there is no conclusion…at least not yet. For them, the jury is still out. In this piece we’ll look at two examples: the NBA’s Draymond Green and MLB’s Chris Sale.
Draymond Green kicks OKC’s Steven Adams (photo, netgamecentralproboards.com)
Green: Green was twice accused of “undesirable play” during the 2016 NBA Playoffs (low blows to opposing players). The third transgression (tussle with LeBron James) led to one-game suspension (Green did not play in Game 5 of the NBA Championship Series). Then, while attending a wedding a few weeks later, he got into an after-midnight shoving match at a bar with a college football player. Green was arrested for assault. And there’s more. Most recently Green apologized publicly for inadvertently posting a picture of his penis on Snapshat.
Sale: Last week Sale made it clear to management that he didn’t want his team to don throwback jerseys. He claimed they were uncomfortable and would cause a change in his pitching mechanics. He pleaded his case, but to no avail. So, to get his way, Sale took a pair of scissors to the aforementioned uniforms. In exchange for maliciousness Sale was sent home from the stadium, fined, and suspended for five additional games. Earlier in the year Sale accused White Sox’ GM, Kenny Williams, of lying about a personnel matter.
Neither Green nor Sale is “just another player.” Green, who was named to the 2015-16 NBA All-Star team, is a vital part of a Golden State Warriors’ team that won the 2015 NBA Championship and was a game away from repeating that feat. Sale, who’s also an All-Star, has won 62% of his decisions during a 7-year career with the Chicago White Sox. With a lifetime ERA is 2.95, Sale is 14-3 (82% wins) in 2016 (pre-suspension record).
While both players are known for being intense and emotional, what happened recently seems out-of-character for Green, but not for Sale.
Chris Sale at FGCU (photo, Greg Kahn, Naples News)
Green wasn’t known in college for having behavioral challenges, even though he played for a high-profile program (Michigan State) with considerable pressure to win national championships. Sale didn’t play in a high-level program (Florida Gulf Coast), but he was as fiery back then as he is today. Sportswriter Dave Moulton recently shared fascinating stories about how the uber-intense Sale handled situations at FGCU.
What makes these players respond as they did? Your guess is as good as mine. But no matter what the explanation(s), all of us can all relate personally to an underlying issue in both cases: the ability to manage one’s emotions. Self-management is a life skill tied inextricably to personal and career success.
It’s clear that these players aren’t able to manage their emotions very well. And it’s not an incident here or there. A pattern of negative behavior has emerged in each case.
Courtesy: sportsnet.ca
Whenever people face challenges–any of us, not just athletes–at issue is whether they’re being enabled to engage in disruptive behavior. You know what I mean: family members make excuses, employers and co-workers look the other way, and friends decide not to intervene.
And when it comes to athletes we–the fans–can serve as enablers. How? We make excuses. We obfuscate what happened. We do those things because “we’re homers.” We tolerate aberrant behavior for good reasons, too. By siding with “our guy” we defend our turf. We want to keep him on the court or field. We support “the home team.”
But in so doing we condone behavior that we know isn’t right. We prefer to look the other way. And we often do that by giving a teenage-like response: “Other players/teams do it, so why is my guy/team getting called for it?”
When Green was accused of hitting competitors in their private parts, “not so,” many fans wrote in the Comments section of news articles. And when Green was suspended by the NBA, fans made comment after comment about how LeBron “gets the benefits of all the calls.”
Courtesy: yardbarker.com
Local journalists, especially beat writers and columnists, can act the very same way. Moulton began his recent article on Sale by describing how he (Moulton) once used a golf club to chop down a tree outside his office building—so upset was he after a meeting with management. “I did it” (Moulton). “He did it” (Sale). So that makes it ok? Hardly.
Moulton ended his article defending Sale and chastising the White Sox: “By now the White Sox should know you don’t mess with the bear when it’s his turn to eat.”
That kind of response puts player above team, something we would never, ever teach young people. But we often do it with athletes. We give our “home town hero” a pass.
Making excuses like that isn’t functional, either. The more we look the other way—and let transgressors off the hook—the greater the likelihood that we’ll see a pattern of repeat offenses.
Green (23) yells at official Ken Mauer during the 2016 season. (photo, Bay Area News Group)
At the very least a cloud hangs over players when they act out this way. Will Green’s “low-style play” continue as a member of our men’s Olympic team? What will be Sale’s relationship with Sox’ management?
Sale’s situation is especially interesting. It has been reported that he is on the trading block. Repeated incidents of insubordination aren’t the primary or only reason. But, at the same time, we all know that organizations tire of dealing with “personnel problems.”
American sports are littered with examples of athletes who got into trouble, didn’t change, continued acting negatively, and eventually fell from grace. The worst example is O.J. We know today that Simpson’s final episode of spousal abuse wasn’t his first.
I’m concerned about players like Green and Sale–great athletes with personal issues that need tending. You should, too, whether you’re “a homer” or not–and especially if you are a homer. Your guy is off the rails. He needs help, not defense.
How might employers, close friends, family members, and other confidants (including role-model athletes) point these guys in positive directions? Well, the first step is for players, like Green and Sale, to recognize that they have issues. The second step is for them to commit to personal change. The third step is to reach out for help.
