Marcus from College Park
*FAN SUBMISSION by our contributor, Marcus from College Park. Follow him on Twitter @MarcusSports1.*
If there ever is an actual plague of Zombies unleashed on a unsuspecting world population, “Patient Zero” will be traced back to the Rotting Coaching Staff of the Burgundy & Gold. Head Coach Mike Shanahan is making a meal of the Doctor, Coaches and Players with his razor sharp, rodent like chopper’s and his driven, nasty personality. Oh it’s a mess alright, the carnage didn’t end with victims just outside of the family….. No, Dad even took a Big Bite out of his Estranged Son’s Ass and turned him into a younger version of his own Ghoulish Self. The rest of the Coaching Staff and Front Office could only cower and hide in the lockers for so long before finally succumbing to the rabid attacks of the Father and Son. Sadly, even The Good Doctor Andrews couldn’t whip up an antidote of heathy RG3 Knee Vaccine in time to quickly stem and turn back the Solanum Virus Spread.
Players were the next victims, fans became gripped with fear at seeing the players staggering lifelessly on the field. The extent of the infection was becoming overwhelming clear, the entire organization, except for Dan Snyder, was decaying and cannibalizing itself right before the horrified eyes of Long Suffering Fan’s and the National Media.
Then “Things” got really bad.
The fans began disappearing “En Masse” starting with the Kansas City Home Game Blowout. Even the most Fiercely Loyal Fans, thought to be immune from the pandemic began to be infected with the disease. The once proud and robust “Son’s of Old DC”, have been reduced to a pathetic collection of Walking Dead….. Listless, Unfeeling, Merciless Corpses with only one Instinct left; to Attack and Rip into the Burgundy & Gold Football Franchise’s Innards’!
Irony is a cruel taskmaster. In an incredible twist of fate, it’s the Owner, Daniel M.(Millhouse) Snyder who Oversees and Orchestrates the Annihilation of his own Empire. Perched above the calamity, Snyder sits comfortably in his Germ Free Fortress. Borrowing from the “Rediker Plan”, Snyder is sacrificing his Lemming Like Fans and using them as bait to Call Out the initial deadly cause of the Catastrophic Zombie Outbreak, Coach Shanahan.
Be assured, at the expense of the fans, Snyder will defeat Shanahan in the end but only in his dream’s. Snyder’s Strategy of Silence and Manipulation encourages the Coach, Media and Fans to savage each other, while he benevolently floats above the bloodshed. Snyder’s Plan of Total Destruction has the coaches rotting under contract until all the NFL coaching vacancies are filled or committed while the Support and Life Long Loyalty of the Fans is simply considered Necessary Collateral Damage in order to destroy the self inflicted Shanahan Plague. Snyder may mistakenly think that not all of the 100,000 people on his laughably claimed waiting list of suckers has been turned into Zombies!
When the dawn rises on the Ashes in Ashburn, Shanahan and his Staff will stumble off into Infamy with Thirteen Million Bucks, Dan Snyder will rule over a Charred, Character Starved and Morally Bankrupt Landscape without Direction or Hope and The Fans, yes the real victims….. The Fans, are left Soulless, Disrespected and Clueless as to a Cure that Buries the Dead, Once and for All and gives rise to a Living, Breathing, Healthy Franchise that doesn’t Feast On and Destroy itself, year after Wasted, Bloody Year.
