New Year’s Resolutions: Marcus from College Park

*New Years Eve Resolutions for the sports world by Marcus from College Park.*

Mike Shanahan: I will always tell the truth…… most of the time. Wait a minute,  what I meant to say was “some of the time”. Hang on, let me clarify that…. I don’t know what telling the truth is, sorry.

The Ravens: We will never hire a fired Washington QB Coach Reject to foul up Joe Flacco’s head ever again. Jim Zorn, Cam Cameron….

Kobe Bryant: Give me complete control of the entire Laker Organization, I’ll  fire everyone, don the infamous L.A. Laker Cheerleader outfit and turns the franchise around.

The National Baseball press, former players and fans: We will never bring up the Steven Strasburg shutdown again.

The NHL Hockey Hierarchy and Players Union: We promise to deal with the reality that it’s not the labor squabble that’s keeping the season from starting but a complete and total lack of interest in our sport, so we will cancel not only the season but the League as well.

Courtesy: Intelligent College Football.com

The University of Maryland Football Program: We will go to the Big 10, go undefeated and win the Rose Bowl against Oregon. Under Armour whips Nike!

The Wizards: We will watch the Hobbit and then use all our unworldly powers to simply disappear from the NBA and planet.

NASCAR: We will remove the points penalties for drivers and instead institute a Mixed Martial Arts format in the winners circle after the race to settle driver disputes.

Soccer Everywhere: We will have a situation were all 22 players fake gruesome injuries and roll around the field in fake agony for the entire game.

Marcus from College Park: I resolve to finish my Screenplay, hit it big and then cover Sports full time.

Happy 2013 everyone